On Being Keltrian
By NiBhrigid

As an initiate in the Ring of the Yew, I have been with The Henge of Keltria for many years. My life before I formally became a druid is so faint to me, I have to close my eyes and edit out portions of my memory even to access that place. I met Karl around 1992 or so. I had bought one of his books on reincarnation and noticed on the back, that the author was from my area. I did a bit of detective work and if I am not mistaken, I wrote him and asked that if he were ever in Maryland again, that we might meet. It took several years after that before he revealed himself as a druid to me. I remember thinking at the time, now I know who I am and what I have always been. Everything about druidism, specifically Keltrian druidism, already fit me. In fact, there was nothing I had to change at all, rather, I felt I only now had the opportunity to fine tune myself on every level. Which brings me to the point that druids are probably born druids, not made. Although a strong solitary individual, I always keep that in mind when ever I am out and about, that I am representing Keltria. I know in my heart, that other druid souls out there may be silently drawn to my energy. I do my best to represent our best. And I quietly think when in the company of rather strict persons of other faiths who have the opinion that paganism is wrong on every level, that you are already close friends with one!

Druidism was something that resonated so deeply within me, it brought back a real sense of ancient druid souls in a “knowing” sense. My eternal image of a door within a door, within a door, and so on. Becoming a druid, well, I am not sure how one “becomes” anything, especially since I strongly believe that for the most part, we have all been druids many times before. Our collective vibration as individuals brings us back to this path over and over again. Being a druid is something innate, although becoming a Keltrian druid is something else entirely. When you first acknowledge that a druid path is something that you must give yourself to, the question of how, why, what and when becomes a repetitive series of questions

I have always felt that the Henge of Keltria has tried its best to capture the entire lifestyle and concepts of druid study. We are more than a social club of pagans, Keltria draws to it individuals that are ready to make a complete commitment, and that is why they gravitate here. We are known for the long wait. I have heard on more than one occasion, the frustration others feel that they cannot become an initiate immediately, and do not see the need for the preparation work needed to become an initiate within Keltria. I understand the impatience they may feel, as once a decision is made about one’s life, the next logical thing would be to embrace that immediately, without hesitation or delay. In our society, attaining a goal quickly is considered part of a successful individual. The long process into becoming a Keltrian druid is absolutely necessary, and is a period of growth and contemplation. I think of this like the evolution of a butterfly. Going through each stage and revealing more about yourself than you even thought possible, at each junction. It also gives the intended, more than ample time to explore other options and see if the Keltrian path is something they feel is the best fit for them.

I went through the correspondence course. The course alone took over a year. It is only the beginning of the eternal druid study, for that is part of the path and does not have a beginning or end. How can you ever say you have learned all there is to be a druid? Ever? For those who stick it out and especially for those who go on to formally initiate, at the end of this road, you realize that the time spent getting there is so brief, and that in reality, the road of growth and study has not even begun yet. It is the door to the path and the path lies before you still. When you initiate, it adds a color to your soul. As a painter, that is how it feels to me. A hue added to the color of what you are intrinsically. I felt like I had reached a level of understanding of myself and who I was. Certainly as a druid, but as a woman as well. As if you were embracing your destiny and could see yourself for the first time, it your completed form. In retrospect, the wait was so brief, that it did not even touch the internal levels of study that would inevitably follow.

It would be fair for someone to say to me, well, if you are a solitary Keltrian and keep to yourself, how can you say you are part of anything? Because, I am part of the whole. And all the other initiates resonate in me. When I sing out the words of ritual from my heart into the night sky, somewhere out there, beyond the edge of all that I see, another Keltrian is saying the exact same words and together, we sing into the night. I feel more than anything I have ever felt in my life, that my words, my intent, my essence not only reaches the other initiates at a visceral level, but I am part of their collective experience, as they are of mine. When you are by yourself, maybe your flame burns faintly brighter, that it may bridge that gap. I feel completed in that moment, it has no words. It falls against me and if the air were to have a color, it feels “pink” and peaceful, and I feel connected and heard. I am always in the background, silent, but always there. Forever present with all my Keltrian family.

So much in life falls away and is transient. Everything comes and goes, the wheel must turn and does, and sometimes sadly so. But, the bond of being Keltrian is an eternal thing. There is nothing to drift from you, you instead grown closer and closer to what you have always been and forever shall be. I find myself feeling without form and in a color I cannot describe, under a night that goes on and on forever and has no end.